My Father's Question

In August, my father walked into my bedroom and asked a relatively innocent question. It sparked ideas in my head, which led to a lightening road trip in October and finally a decision which changes my future. I always thought I'd work full-time with oboe, performing in an orchestra or the like. I don't know where I would be, but I would find a church and be involved as much as I could be there. This was my plan.

"Have you looked into a grad school for church musicians? Maybe a seminary or something?" It was something I had never considered. I didn't even know there were degrees out there for something like that. I started doing some research, comparing different seminaries and their programs. The more I learned, the more I focused in on a particular school. It had the degree that I wanted, a Masters of Arts in Worship, MAW. It also belongs within the Reformed tradition, which is something very important to me. By October, all that was left was an actual visit to the seminary. My friend and fellow oboist, Heather, agreed to accompany me on the trip.

Over the weekend of our Fall Break in October, Heather and I drove out to Grand Rapids, MI to visit Calvin Theological Seminary. We stayed with my Uncle Doug & Aunt Kathy in their new home. They were able to have Rachel Klompmaker, an alumnus of the MAW program over for dinner, which only added to my trip. She explained how having the masters degree has opened doors for her in fields outside the church as well. She now works for a Christian publishing company, and was sought after because of her MAW degree. I met with a few professors and the Registrar, discussing the program requirements and other aspects of the degree, including job opportunities afterwards. Most churches do not have full-time musician positions, but some are looking for a Worship Coordinator, who would oversee more of the worship layout and other aspects in the church. The CTS program also gives me tools to be able to work with Sunday school curricula as well as the weekly service. A part-time position would also allow me to continue playing oboe semi-professionally.

I know that I will never stop playing oboe and performing. Yet I have also learned that it does not have to be an all or nothing type of career. Most professional musicians in orchestras must supplement their income with private lessons or as professors at colleges. Nearly all of the great orchestral players are teachers at nearby colleges. Even still, that lifestyle requires a lot of traveling and constant upheaval. I want a more stable, settled life than that, and be able to have a family and make a home. This degree, and the opportunities it gives me, allows for that type of lifestyle.

I have always struggled to see how my performing is serving God to the best of my abilities. Ever since I've graduated from high school I've been searching for what He wants me to do, for the best way to serve Him. I do not think I made a mistake in coming to Fredonia, or getting my undergrad in music performance. It helped me find the job at the Lutheran church. It allowed me to realize my own strengths and talents, away from my parent's reputations. It also helped me realize that I love to play oboe, but I don't want a life as a professional musician. After my father's innocent question, I seem to have discovered the path God wants me to take next.

The CTS admissions process is already underway. Once all the paperwork, transcripts and recommendation letters have arrived, the seminary will take about two weeks to review everything and give me a decision. I'm hoping to have a decision before the end of January. Of course, then there's looking for an apartment, and figuring out how I'm getting all my stuff out to western Michigan. But first things first! Application, senior recital, the rest of fall semester and spring semester. Once I learn of the CTS decision, I'll worry about the next steps!

Beannachd leat.

Brahms & Beethoven

Cleveland, OH is only about 2 1/2 hours from where I am, and they offer student ticket prices $10-$15. I really don't mind driving there and back to see a concert. I mean, its Cleveland! I've done it more times than I care to count. I know that I will not be this close forever and so I cherish the times I have to see them perform. I've seen some amazing performances, from Midori to Lang Lang and heard Mahler's Song of the Earth and Brahms Symphonies. There is something incredible about hearing an orchestra live that cannot be captured in a recording. The music not only surrounds you, but flows through you.

Tonight I saw the concertmaster and principal cellist perform the Brahms Double Concerto, which was beyond fantastic. The second half of the performance was Beethoven's 3rd Symphony, Eroica. If there are two composers I completely love, it would be them. The group that went ended up being all musicians - three oboists, one bassoonist, two french horn players and a percussionist. So we made an interesting group. I wish I knew the Brahms Double better than I did, but I still enjoyed it. William Preucil, the violinist, is one of my favorite concertmasters to watch. He moves so naturally with the music, leading the section but never in a way that detracts from the music. I've so enjoyed listening and watching him perform over the past few years. It was a treat to see him in such a role. Desmond Hoebig, the cellist, has this gorgeous, dark, lush sound which fills the entire hall, even when he's playing piano. It was excellent to see them perform together.

I did enjoy the Beethoven Eroica as well. At the intermission, there was much discussion over our various favorite Beethoven symphonies. Mine happens to be the Fifth. Earlier this semester, I heard Cleveland perform it. It may seem typical and over picked, but I have my reasons. There is something about a minor symphony, almost indescribable. There is an angst, a disparity, especially in the Fifth that reaches into the darkest parts of my heart and pulls on those strings. Also, being in minor, when it does finally reach a major section, there is such a sense of relief, a release of tension.

It was an enjoyable evening, and hopefully there will be many more in the future. I enjoy going to Cleveland concerts so much. It has helped define what I like and don't like. Its opened me to new music I had not heard before, stretching my musical knowledge. I know someday I will no longer be a student and have to pay full-price for tickets. I will still attend as much as possible, my wallet just may not be as helpful! So I intend on enjoying this as long as I can!

Beannachd leat.

Painfree Playing... Almost

Last week I started physical therapy to deal with some of the issues I've been having with my right hand and arm. For the past 4 years or so, my right pinkie and ring finger have been suffering from numbness and pain. After various doctors and tests, the simple explanation is a pinched nerve way up near my neck and shoulder. One of the things recommended by the doctor was PT, which I decided to try this semester. There is an office right down the road from my apartment, and the doctor, Brad, has dealt with other student musicians. He is understanding of what I need my body to be able to do. Thursday was my fifth appointment. The day before in band, there was a remarkable difference in my fingers. It was wonderful to actually play without pain! Thursday afternoon changed things slightly, as I had a full rehearsal, a lesson and a dress rehearsal - over four hours of playing. I couldn't feel my pinkie by the end of the dress rehearsal. I went home and put ice, then heat on it and eventually it loosened up. In PT this morning, the other doctor I've been working with, Kelly, said this might happen. But that I had done the right thing. Today I'm feeling much better and very much prepared for the concert tonight!



Beannachd leat.

Double Reeds Do Mario

I've never been a big fan of Mondays. The week seems to stretch on infinitely out in front of you. Except this Monday seemed too short. This morning I realized our band only has four more in class rehearsals before our dress and then concert. Our last concert was really quite good, so our conductor has given us more difficult music. I really believe we are up to the challenge, but oh man! Its a lot of notes! But as he pointed out, once the concert is done, band is done. We will no longer have rehearsals and I'll have four more hours each week to do what I need to do. Not to mention time I can spend practicing other things. So for the next two weeks, I've got to hunker down and push on through!

Even so, its important to find humor and enjoyment where you can. One of the oboists in my section, Justin, arranged the Mario Theme Song for double reeds. He passed it out in rehearsal today and we read through it at the very end. We were all exhausted, and sight reading. But it did lift our spirits and the spirits of our fellow bandmates. I was pretty disappointed to be placed in band this semester. I really prefer the orchestra. But as it turns out, I have a pretty rockin' oboe section. The saxes who sit behind us are turning out to be really cool people too. I don't know why, but I seem to have more friends in the band than I did in the orchestra. Surprisingly, I'm really enjoying my ensemble this semester. Who knew?

Beannachd leat.

Early Morning ER Visit

I love the fall. I love the colors, the crispness, the apple cider. I love the fall. It is my favorite season. In addition to all that - Daylight Savings Time ends. This means the clocks go back an hour. There's an extra hour to sleep, or study, or watch TV, or do whatever you want to do! Its a beautiful thing!

I woke up at 8am this morning. Except it was actually 7am! See the wonders of Daylight Savings Time! So I just curled back up and cuddled with my cat. It was lovely. By the time I decided to actually get out of bed, I was actually awake. I made coffee and started sorting out the music for the church service. While I was still in my nightshirt, my roommate, Kelly, came home. She put her stuff down and was headed to the kitchen when disaster struck. I don't know what happened, but she tripped and fell forward. Not a big deal. Except she was carrying glass milk bottles to the fridge. One of the bottles shattered against the wall, and Kelly's left hand handed right in the middle of the broken glass. She didn't realize she was bleeding until she stood up. Instructing her to run cold water over her hand, I quickly put shoes on and ran upstairs to get bandages and ointment. Kelly was crying, scared and in shock. The cut was pretty deep, just by the bottom joint of her thumb. The bleeding was not stopping and we decided a trip to the ER was in order. I got dressed and threw my hair up, while she applied pressure to the wound. While waiting to be checked in, I called one of the women in the church choir to let her know the situation. Usually choir practice is held before our 11am service. I cancelled choir and warned her I might not be able to make it to the service in time. She was gracious, and told me not to worry, she would take care of it.

The nurses and doctors were very kind, and Kelly began to relax a bit. There were still some tears which were shed, but as I kept saying, "Your thumb almost got chopped off! I'd be crying too!" An x-ray showed no visible pieces of glass in the skin after irrigation, and the doctors felt confident all the tendons were intact. She's lost some feeling, which they said is due to the tiny nerves just below the skin being severed. They might regrow, or might not. I showed her how I can't feel the side of my finger that I sliced open last year. But it doesn't prohibit playing or anything else. After five stitches, some ointment and strict instructions, we returned to the apartment. I left for church, but only managed to make it in time for the last hymn and postlude. Thankfully my congregation is very understanding. As a college student, Kelly has no family local enough to take her, and most of our friends either don't have vehicles or were in opera rehearsal. It may have messed up my morning, but this is what you do for friends. Two weeks and then those stitches can come out.

Until then, I've got to do all the dishes.

Beannachd leat.

NoJoMo Start

So much for posting, like ever! Life has just been crazy since the semester started months ago. I feel like I hit the ground running and all of a sudden Halloween is past and the Christmas decorations are out. (Yes, I skipped Thanksgiving, because it seems like that is what seems to happen every year.)

Now to explain the picture. Within the first week of school, my roommate, Kelly and I decided to adopt a cat. I thought it would be a month or so before we actually settled on all the details, and financial burdens. The first discussion happened on Monday and on Thursday I picked up this adorable baby from a Rescue Society. They had named her Anna, which does fit her okay. But I wanted something else, something that fit me and her. After all, she was my cat. A lot of the names I came up with didn't really fit her petite frame and classic tortoise shell coloring. They also didn't fit her sweet and friendly personality. I finally settled on Caledonia, which we've shorted to Cale (pronounced like KAL-ee). Anna still fit her pretty well, so I've kept it as her middle name. She's wonderful, although slightly annoying at times. Aren't cats supposed to like their alone time? Don't they usually like to be off by themselves and will only come to you when they decide they are ready? Not Cale. She hates it when either Kelly or I leave. She follows whoever happens to be home into every room, doing these little purr meows to let you know she's there. If Kelly and I are having a conversation, Cale feels she must add her two cents in as well. It can be a little tiring at times, but she truly is lovable. When we have guests, she climbs up the stairs to observe the going-ons. Once everyone is settled, she'll even come down to say hello and join the conversation. I love having her around, even if she gets a little demanding at times. Kelly will take her home for Thanksgiving Break, and I'll have her for Christmas. After I graduate, she'll go with me wherever I end up heading. Kelly loves her too, but its pretty obvious she's my cat. My Caledonia.

November is National Novel Writing Month, aka NaNoWriMo. The idea is to write an entire novel (50,000 words or more) within a month. People gear up for this all year long, preparing outlines and ideas and characters. I have a few friends who do it each year and truly enjoy it. It focuses them to push through and get stuff down on paper. A few years ago, some fellow bloggers I know decided they wanted in on the excitement. Except they are not novelists. Its just not for everyone. So they created NoJoMo, November Journaling Month. It is an attempt to write one entry, every day for the entire month. Phew! That's a lot of entries! But its something I'm going to try out here. Try to keep updated on whats going on. There's got to be at least one interesting or funny event that happens to me, or around me everyday. Right?

Beannachd leat.